(WVUE) - Verrückt.
Properly translated into English, the word means - among other things - 'mentally unbalanced.'
Fittingly, it is the name of the new waterslide at the Schlitterbahn Waterpark in Kansas City. The 'thrill ride' drops paying customers 168.5 feet down a sheer water slide.
The victims… err, riders… are wrapped in a protective mesh-like human sausage and strapped into a raft. Hurtling down the slide, the rider reaches freeway speeds of up to 65 miles per hour. That's slightly slower than the rotation speed of a Cessna 172R at takeoff.
But wait, there's more! The unfortunate soul is then launched up another five-story section, going weightless at the apex, and finally down to the finish.
Here's a quote from the spokesperson at the Schlitterbahn Waterpark. The spokesperson Winter Prosapio told USA Today:
"I'll go down it once, because I pretty much have to. But I think that'll be enough for my lifetime."
To which I can only say a heartfelt 'Amen.'
As for me, I don't have to do it, and I won't.
I hereby relinquish my turn to anyone who wishes to take it. I'll save 65 mph for I-10, thank you very much. Just one 'mentally BALANCED' person's opinion.